xbox account telling me its a child account tied to a parent account but I don't think it is

Hi BenBk, I hope you're doing great despite the issue you're experiencing. I am an Independent advisor and I am here to help you in regard to your concern.

If you're a child you will be needing to ask your parent to add you as a member or a child on their family group via https://account.microsoft.com/family because they need to manage your account settings.

As long as you're still minor they need to manage your account settings for your security and privacy.

but that's my point, as far as I can see, there is no family group or anything like that. My parents can't help me with the problem.

so if they make an account, add me as a member, and then remove me, will that solve the problem?

They need to create a family group where you will be added as a member. They need to sign in to htttps://account.microsoft.com/family and then add your Microsoft account as a member.