System isn't auto updating in instant on mode, is this normal in insiders program?

unfortunately, not all updates able to install in instant on mode of the xbox.

But daily updates is only in Insider program

There are a few things, are you both on instant on and to keep everything auto updated. Also are either of you in the Xbox Insider Preview program?

If you keep your console in Instant On mode the updates will go automatically overnight or at times you are not on. I haven't seen an update in ages.

Also if you are in the Insider Program updates are pretty frequent but you can always opt out of the program.

You'll get a lot more updates being in the insider program.

Set your console for instant-on mode and they'll update while your not using your console. You'll never notice them.

Hello Razor,

You may want to consider turning on the auto update feature and the instant on feature. That way your console can update while its in sleep mode. If this is not something you'd like as a solution, you can try updating the console as the updates roll out.
This most recent update rolled out on the 12th of February, although it isn't mandatory right away. Without Auto updates on, the system will force the update on you once it becomes mandatory. News on updates can be found on
News.Xbox.com

I apologize for the inconvenience, but Instant on + auto updates may save you from future frustration.

Hope this helps!