i was just trying to make a new microsoft account but then it put my "child" to the family...

Got an update, By making emails and messing around with the microsoft families stuff, This account is now the 'Child' In a family to a new profile. I can't however get this profile to be listed as a child on the console family.

If the date of birth on the child account when it was originally set up has reached the age of 18 then you would have to sign in with the parental account at account.microsoft.com/family and remove the child from the family. and that would put the child
into its own family as an adult. if you remove the child from the current family and its date of birth when the account was originally setup has not reached 18 it will not allow the account to be signed in until it is put into a new family as a child.

Thank you for explaining this. So in order for my younger son to have me as a family leader and set his screen time etc would I need to make myself a new Microsoft account and then make him his own one too so I appear as the adult and he as the child? And then would I register the new Xbox in my account name or his?

I wish they would put adult details required and child details required to make this clearer 🤦‍♀️

Thank you so much for your help

That makes no sense. Firstly I can do everything on my account without putting in further verification. Yet this only happens when I try to activate something on my child accounts. Also I am the only one with gold. No family pack here.

I don't know if anyone is still looking for the answer, but here it is:

Sign in to the account you're trying to add to the Xbox Live Family, and go to their Account Settings. You should see an option "Promote Account." Select that, and you'll be able to add that account.

The problem is that you're trying to add someone else's child to your family. You need to "promote" that child back to an adult before adding him/her to your own family.

Put differently: that account was previously a member of a different Xbox Live Family. "Promoting" that account removes it from that Xbox Live Family completely (not just Gold status), allowing you to add it to a new one.