Why is my message offensive?

Don't send offensive messages or use offensive language & you've got nothing to worry about.

Why would you want to add someone who sent you an offensive message? That's a silly argument really.

By suspending offensive players they are protecting people on Xbox live.

Because you used offensive language in a message. That is why you got suspended. You deserved it for using the offensive language. As boozyhead has said post in the suspension forums

Yes it does count. As long as you file complaints on them the enforcement team will investigate them.

If you haven't already, you'll need to file a complaint on them via the console. Calling out gamers is not allowed on the forums and you should not post the offensive messages here.

If you check the
Xbox Code of Conduct, it says that certain content is prohibited, including "Content that promotes, or sounds or
looks like words, phrases, puns, images or imagery that refer to any prohibited content" (bold emphasis by me).

So yes, if alternate characters or symbols are used to make a string of characters "look like" offensive content, you can report it, and the Enforcement Team will act on that report.