Why do we have to pay to play free games?

But actually on both nintendo switch and ps4, they don t force you to play online, they actually let you choose if you want the services or if you just want to play, unlike xbox live which forces you to pay.

That would be due to the game accessing MS's online features. It is the same on PS4 and Switch as well.

Gray, Youve never worked with steam much have you? you can buy a game, play it and if you hate it or it plays like trash on your PC you can get a refund no problem

and theres a number of people who have had steam accounts hacked, when contacting steam they require hard proof of identity (pictures of CC or something) and take care of you

The short answer: It's just the way it is.

But others have mentioned the reasoning behind the charges, as it does cost to keep the servers running and maintain them, and to buy more epuipment/ replace equipment, etc.

The money we spend on Xbox Live goes to the employees and equipment costs to run online servers.