My Minecraft beta will not update to 1.15.0.55 at all but my friends seem to have it...

Verify that you all have the same minecraft update, it may be that some of your friends are subscribed to the beta version of the game.

When got the newer update for minecraft on my xbox one it gave me the 1.13.0.4 update and when i try to join my friends it says that they have an out dated server because they all have the 1.12.0.2 update and it dose not alow them to get my update. Also
i have already had a discussion with a someone who works at mojang and they said that "Updates do not have anything to do with them if i need help with that i need to contact Microsoft" witch i did but i could only speek to an automated response system, and
that was not helpful at all. So i came here to see if this could help me out.

P.S. I have restarted my xbox 12 times and deleted then reinstalled minecraft 18 times but im game still dose not let me play with my friends.

Your on the beta you need to leave the beta program to play with 1.12 people

I have clicked on my preview/beta tile on the dashboard, I was able to refer a friend but I don't seem to have the update. I want to use the tv one guide lol.

Your son is playing on the official release channel for Minecraft. His 1.12 version is currently the latest official version, whereas his friends have joined the Insider Program and are playing a beta test version of Minecraft.

His friends can either un-enroll from the Beta Insider Program, or you son can try to join the Insider Program and update his Minecraft to a beta version.

Be aware however, that beta version still contain untested parts, and the game can crash, malfunction and in turn destroy worlds if an error occurs.

If your son is still willing to test the Beta, he can download the free Insider app from the store, and join the Minecraft Beta.

Then he'll have to download/update his Minecraft to the newer beta version.

Make sure that you or your friends are not on Minecraft Beta, because if you are on beta and your friends not on beta (vice versa), then you two will not be able to connect to each other at all. Also if both of you are on beta make sure that you are in
the same version (which you can check from the Minecraft home menu). If you or your friends are on the beta program I would personally recommend leaving it, sure you get early access to updates which is great, but its alot more hassle then its worth.