Minecraft server/Multiplayer Settings?

From Minecraft/Microsoft -

https://minecraft.net/en-us/article/minecraft-multiplayer-server-safety

“Join Multiplayer Games” Settings
If you have your settings set to block joining multiplayer games, you can’t join any multiplayer games in Minecraft, including shared local worlds, Realms or servers. To enable multiplayer in Minecraft, make sure this setting is set to ‘Allow.’

However, just like ASCllnaut, that setting was already turned on for my children. In other words I'm in the same boat, we can play on the LAN but not on a realm.

Hi and thanks for reaching Microsoft Xbox gamer's community. My name is Josef.
I'm an Independent Advisor and a Microsoft Xbox user like you.

Hope you're doing great today despite this Felicia

Is this happening on Xbox, right?
When you say "I need to fix my settings", are you referring to privacy settings?
If that's the case, could you double check this here:

https://account.xbox.com/Settings

And, also tell me which troubleshooting steps you have done so far to fix this, in that way I can advise you different things or how to proceed

I'll be waiting for your reply, greetings from a Microsoft user

The Multiplayer setting, Im not using a kids Account since i am Older then 18. Is states on minecraft i need to turn on some Multiplayer Setting To Play on servers and with Friends.

I have not been able to play on the Minecraft Multiplayer servers that I have payed for and have no way to access my settings to reenable my multiplayer.

A multiplayer server allows two or more players to play Minecraft together. You can either download the server file needed to set up your own server from Minecraft.net or connect to another person's server. Note: To access a server you need to run the same version of Minecraft as the server