Game Sharing Settings

this link should help you out with understanding privacy settings -> Manage Privacy settings

Gold can only be shared on one console, not across consoles. So you would either need to purchase gold for her account, or you would need to set her console as your Home console in order for her to be able to share your gold.

Apparenty i have a childs account, do i need to make a new account for an adult to change settings

With the Home setting on the One, you are allowed to share games. However, it is recommended your own console is set as your Home and you're sharing games with people in your own household. But technically you could set any console you want as your Home
and share games that way. So it isn't really illegal, you won't get arrested for it. But yeah, sharing outside of the home, really isn't fair to the developers.

The family settings are to help set controls on other accounts such as limiting time or purchase restrictions. It has no effect on the ability to share games. Sharing games is tied to the Home setting. Physical copies cannot be shared because you need the
disc in the drive in order to verify you own the game so it can only be done with a digital copy.

So in order to share a game/gold, you would first purchase it on one account, that account would set a console as their Home. They can then sign in and play on the non-Home console.