Can't sign in OR delete account

I have been trying for ages to get into my Microsoft account. I can no longer access it at all. I made the account years ago when I was much younger, and it's the only account that I use. However, I also deleted the email used to make that account years ago. I don't remember the password, can't sign in at all.

I don't know how to verify that the account is mine. I've tried to over and over, but I lived in an entirely different state when I made the account and never purchased anything with it.

Both options I see are to be able to sign into the account, or make a new one. But I really like the username I have, and I use it constantly for different platforms. It's super special to me, I made it when I was younger and it's stuck with me. If I make a new account, I want that username still.

I also really wish I could just contact someone at customer support instead of having to deal with a bot that doesn't understand what I'm asking, or going to a forum, but I can't find an email address anywhere. In all honesty all of the security Microsoft has on its accounts has been more of a pain than helpful. This has just been a strenuous process that I'm getting tired of fast.

:)